Here is a list of rules that seems to apply to soaps operas (especially Neighbours, and Hollyoaks). I have observed these rules over my many dedicated years of soap following.

Break-up Rule: “I never want to see you again” This actually means I’m angry and we wont make up until next episode. Also “We’re breaking up for good” often means we’ll break up until next episode. See Russ and Mercedes from Hollyoaks for a recent example of this.

Prison Rule 1 – Same Cell: If anyone two people from a soap are in prison at the same time they are bound to be in the same wing of the same prison. Often they will even get to share a cell. Recent examples are Becker and Jacqui McQueen from Hollyoaks. Older examples are when Lou and Darcy from Neighbours got put in the same cell (Darcy had grown a goatee because that’s what people do in prison).

Pictured above Darcy without a goatee.

Prison Rule 2 – One in One Out: Neighbours seems to operate a one in one out policy on prisons and Darcy was released after sharing his cell with Lou for a few weeks. Roco is currently in prison so next time someone goes down he’ll probably be allowed out.

Moving and Coma Rule: If any one moves away but continues to get scene’s (i.e. they are filmed on the phone to a character still in the soap), they are bound to return. Also if anyone is ever put into a Coma it’s guaranteed they will wake-up in a few months time.

Please add your own Soap Rules to the comments section. There will be more Soap Rules next week!

Pete xXx